Some people say ignorance is bliss. I think those people deserve to be killed with garden tools.

Ignorance is a cancer on our society, and it needs to be stamped out, not celebrated. There are those of us who think and act above the 5th-grade level, and we'd appreciate not feeling that we're a rare breed on the verge of extinction.

Our society embraces ignorance, and I'm shocked and embarrassed for us all that such a thing is not only acceptable, it is worn like a badge of honor in some quarters. Theoretically, ignorance can be cured, but that assumes that the suffering party wants to fix it.

All too much these days, that simply isn't the case. Here we come to the difference between ignorance and stupidity. Ignorance is a lack of knowledge (for example, I'm really ignorant about British politics, but that can be fixed through reading and asking questions), while stupidity represents an underlying pathology very similar to simple apathy.

If ignorance is not knowing, stupidity is not caring. If ignorance is bliss, then stupidity is like a three-day bender on Bawl's, Cocoa Puffs and Crystal Meth. It may be a big, steaming heap of fun, but the after-effects certainly aren't pleasant.

Most people who know me are well aware that I have a low tolerance for stupidity. It smacks of laziness, and it isn't the least bit charming, cute, funny or sexually appealing. I don't care what your friends tell you after six beers at the demolition derby or the local kegger, but the dumb blonde act isn't the least bit entertaining–it's grating and annoying, and you should be ashamed of yourself.

Case in point: the internet (sorry, "teh intarnets"). If you've read this site, you'll notice a dearth of comments. It's not for lack of submissions. I've had over 800 comments sent to the site; it's just that most are either pointless "me too!" drivel, or they're just poor writing with little substance. Here's exhibit A:

"amazing lol…any way..here is my input…NOT A TRAMP STAMP…hows that? clear enough? lol..no really people put tats all over their bodies..why is this one the bad name?..lets get real..does it really matter. Tats are a choice ..your body is yours do what you will..dont criticize others for their choices..see ya."

The username logged was a mizzcherri, and of course, it came from AOL. This is why I've told Apache to reject all incoming mail from AOL for the last six years: absolutely nothing interesting comes from their banal service, and I've never met anyone on it for whom I've felt any sort of respect.

The comment above may seem like the Labrea Tarpit of grammar and punctuation, but trust me, this isn't the worst of what I see. In fact, it's pretty much middle-of-the road. Technology gave us a great communication medium with the internet, and this is how we use it?

I've had to endure a conversations with peope like Mizzcheri in the flesh. In fact, I have to do so with distressing regularity. Most people don't say "lol" aloud (though I have heard it), but otherwise, this disjointed, foggy mess is pretty typical of spoken conversation.

Here's a simple rule that will save you a great deal of trouble: if you don't have something worthwhile to say, keep your mouth shut. Same goes for the keyboard.

I have no idea what they're teaching in the schools these days, but I meet (presumably) grown adults on a daily basis who have no functional communication skills in their own language. The stuttering, mumbling, idle-profanity spewing masses are no longer just a few hicks from the wrong side of the tracks–they are the majority. This is why France laughs at us, folks. FRANCE.

It's depressing that I find it easier and more pleasant to converse with people from such far-flung places as Japan and Eastern Europe in English than I do with Americans. Foreigners still approach the language as something new and delicate, they put effort into clarity, and they're usually far more courteous than anyone stateside.

I have an acquaintance who teaches elementary school. She laments the fact that not only are American students far behind the rest of the First World in science and math skills, they are barely able to communicate in their own language. Most read several grades below their age, and these are the kids from "good" homes.

So, where does the blame lie? Before you succumb to the knee-jerk answers, consider that violent videogames, vapid reality TV and Dave Chappelle aren't the disease. They're the symptoms. The real problem lies with the shoddy state of parenting in this country.

All the other "factors" are the effects, not the cause. I can tell you this: my parents spanked. Hard. I would never have talked to my parents the way I hear adolescents do these days. Casual profanity was not tolerated, and my parents checked my homework. It's called discipline.

Here's the rub: from the time I was 13, I was raised in a single-parent household by a working mother. Still, for the most part, she knew who my friends were, where I went, and what I was doing. Even in my teenage years, I understood full well that if I got into serious trouble, I was on my own. Not having a rich daddy's squad of lawyers on retainer is a good incentive not to commit arrestable offenses.

These days, we have the "not my kid" syndrome. It's not Timmy's fault he was driving 95m/h in a school zone with a lit joint in the ashtray. No, it's the automobile industry's fault for not having school-zone-detection-devices installed in the car. It's his friends' fault for "peer pressure." It's society's fault for allowing gangsta rap to corrupt our children. Timmy's certainly not at fault. He's our kid, so he must be a good boy.

Try blaming Timmy's parents, and see it hit the fan. They're too busy to raise their child. Like all successful people, they've got golf games, makeovers and adultery to attend to. Gosh, raising a child is hard, and they don't have time for that. It cramps the lifestyle. How dare we blame them?

So, Timmy grows up to wear a baseball cap tilted sideways. His "homies" call him T-Dog, even though he's a white kid from an affluent suburban family. He pulls his baggy pants halfway down his ass, slouches, curses at grownups and god help us all, he gets on the internet.

Folks, this is how MySpace happens. Stop the madness. Use birth control. Think of the children.