Twinkies

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Our Long National Nightmare Is Over

galactus_twinkies

It’s been seven months since Twinkies went out of production. Seven interminable, agonizing months. I have hungered. I have been irritable and cranky. I have had to resort to normal food to keep my blood sugar normalized.

No more! The Hostess brand has been purchased by Apollo Global Management LLC (which is totally not the name of an adult video company), and Twinkies will be back on store shelves on July 15th. I am going to order a case of Jolt Cola, take a couple of days off, and gorge myself until I look like Orson Welles.