Ah, April 22nd. Birthday of Vladimir Ilyich Lenin, leader of the October Revolution and savior of the Proletariat. Let us all take a moment to…
What? Oh. Oh…that April 22nd. Earth Day. Right. I’m sure it’s just a coincidence.
Earth Day wasn’t founded by Lenin. It was founded by Ira Einhorn, who, unlike Lenin, only murdered one person.
Accounts vary, and many contest the allegation that he founded it, though he claims to have done so. What is uncontested is that he was pivotal in organizing it, and he served as Master of Ceremonies for the inaugural Earth Day Rally in 1970.
Heck with it, I’m going to buy about 300 cases of Aqua Net and use it all in one fell swoop. If I survive the fumes, at least I’ll know I helped keep that pesky ozone layer from healing itself. Think of the tan I’ll have then.
