Clippy

1 post

Assault Clips

Nobody knows for sure what made Clippy snap.  Perhaps it was the cocaine.  Maybe it was the way Steve Ballmer would sneak up and grope him when they were alone in the break room.  For all we know, he hit the breaking point when he turned on the television and saw himself being voiced by Gilbert Gottfried.

All we know is that the 21st century wasn’t being kind to Clippy, and he wasn’t taking it anymore.

One January morning in 2000, he showed up at the Microsoft offices in Redmond with a Glock 19 and a 33-round magazine.  There would be blood.  Oh yes, there would be blood.

However, Clippy’s rampage was cut mercifully short by the fact that he lacked fingers and was unable to operate the gun.  King County deputies arrested him on weapons charges.  He took an insanity defense, and he’s currently getting the help he needs.

I wish the same could be said of the Brady Campaign.